If today’s liquid lunch is any indication of how this week’s business trip is going to go, well, color me amused, and kind of disgusted. (And, no, not that kind of liquid lunch, just a caffeine-laden calorie fest to hold me over four hours until I can grab some linner in Atlanta before my next leg.)

Seriously.

The only thing funnier than this picture was this:

The barista popped the top on, this popped out the top and whipped cream shrapnel hit her bangs. She looked at the drink, looked at her bangs, then looked at me and yelped, “Awwww, man.” But then she probably realized it was kind of funny and looked hilarious, so she slid it across the counter to me with a devilish smirk, secretly wishing me good luck and probably already making a mental list of friends to whom she was going to text about giving this lady at work today a pretty phallic-looking frappuccino.

Really, now.

Is there a delicate way to fix this? Do I wipe it off? Lick it? Insert a straw and try to get this ridiculousness to slink back into the cup? Ugh. None of these was a good option. Especially in public. I was going to be victim number two of whipped cream shrapnel no matter what I chose.

Two dudes in the Starbucks chuckled at my drink. Of course they did. It was slightly phallic. Slightly. And the fact that we were dealing in whipped cream here didn’t help matters.

This is a perfect pic for ‘caption this’. Have at it, folks!