Apparently the sweet little Hello Kitty motif of the sweater Santa gifted Grace for Christmas was not quite “fashionable” enough for our little Grace.

It needed something else.

Something a little extra.

Something to push the cute factor over the top.

Something that might swaddle tiny six-year-old thumbs in a soft fabric hug.

You know…something like thumb holes.

After she Billy Ray Cyrused her hair at the age of three, you’d think Kenny and I would have learned that access to scissors is not a good thing for our gal Grace. But nope, the trust creeped back in and we got lax.

And a sweater was her latest victim.

Grace asked to wear her Hello Kitty sweater and some comfy pants on a lazy weekend day. I obliged. After dressing, she came into my room to ask if she could go outside to play, and I spied what I assumed was a little hole in her sweater. I went to take her hand to inspect further. She pulled it back and made wide eyes at me.

I said, “What happened to your sweater?”

She said, “Oh, it got some holes.”

I said, “Ok, that happens sometimes. Let me see the damage.”

Grace shook her head as she said firmly:  “No.”

Me: “Why not?”

Grace: “Well, the holes are big. I don’t think you’ll be happy.”

Me: “I can only see if it can be fixed if you show me.”

Grace slowly held out her arms. Not one arm. Both arms. Which revealed quarter-sized holes.

And yea, no. That can’t be fixed.

I was slightly amused, slightly annoyed. I had a sneaky suspicion on what went down.  (And by sneaky suspicion, I mean I knew exactly what happened.) Very calmly, I said, “Hmmmm. How did this happen?”

Grace started to lie.

Great. We’re raising a mini Vivienne Westwood who is also a lying liar pants.

I stopped her and asked her to think about what really happened.

She started to lie again. (So you don’t think I am a horrible, untrusting mother: she has a tell – she won’t look at me and re-starts the story at least three times if she’s telling fib-a-roonie-doonies.)

I stopped her again and reminded her that you always get in less trouble if you tell the truth – even if you did something wrong. She said, “Remind me how that works again.” (Hahaha. Oh my. She is a clever little thing – weighing her options.)

I said, “If you did something you shouldn’t have, apologize and tell Mommy the truth about it, Mommy will only be upset for one thing. BUT, if you did something you shouldn’t have, and lie about it, Mommy always finds out the truth and then I will be upset for TWO things.” She nodded slowly.

She said, “OK.”

I asked her if she decided to make thumb holes in her sweater.

She nodded slowly and wouldn’t look up.

I said, “I am not mad.”

Shocked, she whipped her head up to look at me. I asked her to tell me what happened.

Finally, the truth. She said, “Wellllllllll, I like this sweater, but the sleeves are a little long. And I have small arms. Remember when Daddy gave me thumb holes in my soccer shirt? I thought they would be good for this sweater.”

I said, “OK, honey, that makes sense to me, but I don’t want you to change your clothes in any way unless you check with me first. ”

She smiled a small (mischievous?) smile and said, “But what if I can make it prettier?”

Good luck to us. Really.