Portlandish: Oh Deer!

January 16, 2014

I have mentioned before that flights back to Portland are my favorite. Mostly because it means I am heading home to my family (and bed and pillow), but also because they oftentimes offer unrivaled visual spectacles.

Take that picture, for instance.

Yes, that’s a deer (?!) rack.

ON THE LUGGAGE BELT.

AT THE AIRPORT.

IN PORTLAND.

I have never in my life seen a real deer rack that close. Let alone one riding the luggage belt a bag ahead of mine. (For the purposes of this blog, I am assuming it’s a deer rack vs. some other animal antlers.) And I am not convinced that the bag between my bag and the deer rack didn’t contain other deer parts. It was this weird, plastic, blue cooler-y looking thing. The drama queen in me fully expected it was full of deer steaks and organ meat. The hidden vegetarian in me wanted to cry. The Curious George in me couldn’t stop staring. In fact, he made me stay and take MORE pictures even though my bag was one of the first ones out. Hahaha.

The pic above is from my deer-rack-stalkerazzi efforts. The pic next to this paragraph is the one that I first took – when I was done photo-34staring at the deer rack trying to figure out if I was actually seeing what I was seeing. The clamor from the few other passengers who had already made it to luggage claim and airline employees confirmed that yes, they were indeed antlers. My trying-to-find-the-camera frenzy is reflected in the blurry picture. By  the time I realized that YES – they were indeed ANTLERS, I almost missed my picture opportunity. So I hung around to get a better shot.

To be honest, I was equally amused and grossed out. I totally assume this deer rack hitched a ride from PHX to PDX on my lovely little suitcase because they were so close together in exiting. I mean really. It’s the first proper suitcase out behind the rack and the weird, plastic, blue cooler-y looking thing. They definitely touched. Ew. I am not sure why this grosses me out, but it does. Ew.

Of course, there’s a pre-story to all of this. Despite my very best efforts to avoid using the bathroom on such a short flight, I failed. Sooooo….Coming out of the bathroom when I was going in was a gal in her 60s with a camo baseball hat and camo shirt on. (You see where this is going.) I thought that was kind of an interesting fashion statement, but, hey, I very rarely stray from all black, so who am I to say? This could be the hottest look on the runway as far as I knew.  While I waited for the deer rack to make its second loop so I could snap proper pictures for this blog, my bathroom trip came back to me in a flash. In that instant, I KNEW these antlers were hers. Knew it. My eyes darted around the crowd, and yep, she was waiting for luggage. As I left after snapping my pictures, I caught a last glimpse of the antlers – and the weird, plastic, blue cooler-y looking thing – sitting on top of her suitcase. Hahaha.

Chalking this up in the learn something new every day category. I never knew you could “check” tokens of your hunting trip!

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